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    How to Get the Most Out of Therapy

    Wondering how to get the most out of therapy? Perhaps you’ve gathered up the courage to pick up the phone, an appointment is scheduled, and now you’re wondering what lies ahead. You’ve committed your mind, finances, and time to a stranger in the hopes that you might just feel a little bit better.

    Once you’ve found a therapist you feel comfortable with, you’ll have a safe place to explore your inner workings.

    So, how might you get the most out of therapy? Here are five top tips to consider.


    1. Show Up

    To reap the benefits of therapy, you’ll need to consistently show up. With any big life change, there must be intentional investment, consistency, and routine.

    Be protective of your scheduled therapy appointment and make it a priority. A friend you rarely speak to or see has the potential to become less and less of a friend over time. A therapist you rarely speak to or see can only do so much as they are not seeing the full you.


    2. Challenge Yourself

    It might not feel possible to open the door to the room you’ve closed and placed locks upon. Maybe the first session you just stand among the door; and the next you knock, and the next you remove one lock, until a few sessions later your foot goes through.

    Eventually you can be fully immersed in that room, with the therapist standing next to you.

    When you’re challenging yourself, pushing just a bit beyond that which feels possible, results will come.

    Leonard Cohen sings, “There is a crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in.”

    Allow the therapist to join you in the broken places as that will allow light to enter. You might feel like it’s too scary to discuss that certain topic even for one more second. Push yourself and stay there for just 10 more seconds. Maybe you’ll make it to 30 seconds the next time. Over time, that room won’t feel so scary, and you’ll see the light begin to enter.


    3. Practice Vulnerability

    Therapy is a space to show up as your authentic self, with the extra privacy knowing your therapist cannot share anything outside of a few exceptions (such as there being a risk of safety to yourself or someone else).

    This is a place to say all the things you say in your head but are afraid for others to know. Therapists hear many stories, and your story will not surprise them. Uncover those unspoken words, stories, memories. Practice being fully you.


    4. Speak Up About What Isn’t Working

    The therapy hour and process is for your benefit. Share what’s going well and what’s not going well to give your therapist feedback on the process.

    Nodding along with an activity you don’t like or aren’t invested in isn’t helpful for either of you. You won’t hurt their feelings by being honest. They’ll likely celebrate the honest feedback as it’ll allow them to better help you in the destination you’re hoping to get to.

    Going along with a therapeutic activity you don’t like is akin to getting in a car for a road trip you didn’t sign up for. You’ll end up at the wrong destination.


    5. Develop Yourself Outside of Therapy

    It's important to cultivate your mental wellbeing skills outside of the therapy hour.

    You’re with a therapist one hour a week, maybe one hour every two weeks depending on the schedule. That means you have either 167 hours or 335 hours outside of therapy each week or two that can be used to propel or impair your growth.

    What are you willing to do outside of therapy to carry forward your growth?

    Whether you’re given homework or not, you have the ability to develop yourself outside of sessions.

    This means developing awareness of your internal world, having insight into unhelpful thoughts, and being willing to actively transform patterns.


    Summary

    To get the most out of therapy, you’ll need to:

    • Show up – make your therapy a priority.
    • Challenge yourself – push just a bit beyond that which feels possible, and results will come.
    • Be vulnerable – be your authentic self, even if it feels a little uncomfortable at first.
    • Speak up – be honest about what's working and what isn't.
    • Develop yourself outside of therapy – stay actively engaged in your growth outside of sessions.

    Journaling Prompts

    Here are some journaling prompts to help you explore these principles:

    • What would it mean to truly prioritise my healing right now?
    • What gets in the way of me fully committing to this process?
    • What am I avoiding exploring? Why might this be?
    • What parts of myself do I find hardest to share with others?
    • What has felt most helpful in therapy so far?
    • What hasn’t felt quite right?
    • Are there any kinds of preferences I’ve been holding back from expressing?
    • What would I like my therapist to understand better about me?
    • What practices support my growth outside the therapy room?
    • How do I currently reflect between sessions, if at all?

    Invest in Practical Mental Health Worksheets

    Not everyone can afford therapy, and part of our mission at The Wellness Society is to help bridge the gap for people unable to access professional support.

    Research shows that self-help materials are often enough for people to overcome mild to moderate mental health difficulties.

    If you’re interested in a step-by-step program that includes tools from CBT, ACT and more, be sure to check out The Mental Wellbeing Toolkit. A user told us it's "like 10 therapy sessions in one."

    The Mental Wellbeing Toolkit

     

    About Brittany

    Brittany Ellmer is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Clinical Manager with expertise working with anxiety, depression, and survivors of trauma. Brittany has experience working in settings such as residential treatment, outpatient treatment, private practice, higher education, and in workplace wellbeing spaces. Brittany approaches therapy from a trauma-informed attachment based lens with the belief that our early life experiences shape who we are.

    Brittany provides individual therapy through her private practice, the Healing Collective Counseling & Consulting PLLC. Learn more about Brittany’s practice here.